Never Give Up

Over the past few weeks, I've been trying to hold my head high with confidence, even when I've been hurting inside.  It's not easy, and I'm at the end of the road yet, but here's something I know is true:

There will always be someone there for you.  Your friends, family, co-workers, schoolmates, etc..  If you've been bullied or beaten, you're probably saying "No one loves or cares for me".  Your parents hate you, your friends hate you, even random people do.  But, there's more to life than just going through and getting hated on.  There's a reason to go on, even when you think there is.  It's not clear yet, but it's going to become clear.

I've given a million excuses as to why I should die; I'm not worth it; people will get over it; I'm better off dead; no one will notice - Even if they do, they'll forget about it and move on.  Well that isn't true.  Someone will notice your absence; you killing yourself is a sign of weakness, giving up because it's too hard.  It *is* hard, but it'll get better.

Heard those words before?  "It'll get better" - I know you think that's bull, and I did too, but if you try to get help, it'll be better.  It's not going to change over night, or maybe in a few weeks, but there's always hope.  Someone is there and cares for you.  You may say "I'm not worth it" or "No one cares for me", but if you take a second and think about it, there are people who would suffer with you gone.

A few days ago, I had a conversation with a pretty nasty person:

Anonymous:  Go kill yourself

I left when he said that, but was in tears because of it.  I then told my friend about it, and I asked "Why do I keep living, even when people like that can't please me?  I just want to die".  She said the person is a troll.  I said I would die, and they wouldn't care...People would forget about me.  But she said "I wouldn't...".

What.  Kill myself over a person with a sick sense of humor?  I now know that wasn't the answer, and those words still hurt, but with every "troll", comes every "angel".  Giving up would let the troll know he won.  It seems hopeless, but if you evaluate the situation, you can see it's just something that doesn't mean anything in the long run.  Killing yourself isn't the solution; the solution is being the better person.

"The best revenge is to live on and prove yourself" ~ Eddie Vedder

Being alive isn't a bad thing, it doesn't cause people pain; it means you are strong enough to live the life you were given.  Don't throw that away because some nasty people can't stand who you really are, prove them wrong and make the most out of it.  You're always cared for by people who take the time to do it; don't give up.

December